When I cannot sleep, I write 

Hey beauties

Currently, it is 11.31pm and I’ve been hit with a mass wave of painsomnia. My anxiety probably isn’t helping either and it’s times like this (we’ll always really but especially now) that I wish my crazy mind would just shutup for a few hours and give me peace.

You all seemed to really enjoy the last blog piece I wrote, which was based on my mental challenges I suppose we can call them. I received countless messages. On all of the All About Annie pages aswell as my personal ones! People I nevver would have guess who suffered emotionally thanking me for writing what I did. Telling me it was as if I was inside their head spilling their stories and their heart to the world.  It was absolutely amazing to receive this kind of feedback. Especially about a post that took crazy amounts of courage to post. I was so sweaty when I linked it to my Facebook page lol.

However all of this has got me wondering about what else influenced this post to be one of my top 3 most viewed posts.

Was it because it was relatable?

Because I was honest and raw?

Because you just genuinely enjoyed having a nosy into my life? (This is a fine option by the way. We all love a good read lol)

The obvious answer is because I spoke about something that a lot of people deal with. However I’m not sure that is entirely why that post was so successful, sure it would have played a huge part, but part of me wants to pick out the why the other readers enjoyed it!

Part of me truly thinks that it’s just because it’s something different. Something that people are normally to embarrassed, scared, ashamed, something that people do not like to admit they go through in fear of what others may thing of them and how they will be perceived. I think this post interested a lot of people who actually are unfamiliar with the feeling of self loathing to a degree where it is very dark and lonely.

They took my post as an opportunity too see that “I’m depressed” doesn’t just mean the pair of shoes they wanted to buy are sold out or that their is no spinach at the supermarket. They got to truely feel how I felt. And to me that is bloody fantastic!

Depression, Anxiety and all other mental health issues are always made to sound like some dirty thing that only bottom of the pile, yuck people get. Well that’s not the case! And no wonder no one wants to talk about it, they are afraid of the label that will get attached to them!

I make it very clear that my pages are all about making you guys who suffer feel loved, supported and normal. Because that 100% is and always will be my number one goal and ambition. However, if I am teaching those around all of us what our struggles really are like and making them somewhat understand all of the emotions, pain and sadness that we deal with – my dreams have been blown out of the park. Because that in turn will complete my number one goal!

I truly think I was put on this planet to write and to speak for those who cannot speak for themselves. Throughout life I have always known I was destined to help those who are less fortunate than most, to help those who are suffering and those that need a helping hand. My first calling and what I wanted to dive into was help under privileged children. Those who grew up in the gang life and need assistance to get the grades and life lessons they needed to get out.

After receiving and email saying that I had gotten into the university degree I needed to do the above, I realised that my own mental state wasn’t stable enough to help these children.
However thankfully, whilst working on myself I can assist you all too! I can share my thoughts and trial and errors with you all! And what a huge bonus if I’m helping non suffers understand!!!

That’s all for my “I’m too sore and can’t shut my mind up” speal for tonight.

Lots of love and light to each and everyone of you.

A

xxx

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